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In the still of the silence the ache returns to me. It has been said that longing is the seed of sacred knowledge.. yet the longing feels like an unwelcomed visitor It is not of the deep dark recesses of the spirit that require churning, delving and discovery It is instead born of the animal hunger to be met by another I havent yet determined if this hollow sadness that beckons me forward is related to the seperation of our souls or if it belongs to me and this journey I have been called to, but for now he remains the present day embodiment. My tender heart has been so protected for so long I have forgotten how painful it is to sit in the mists of a longing heart. Somtimes the cosmos gifts feel like jokes that only the trickster truly understands My heart had arrived vibrant and strong Welcome love she whispered, and so i did those moments in the universe flashed by like a tiny glimpse into an ever unknowing mystery i have learned her rythyms and accepted its fates i reap the knowledge and return grateful for the growing pains but in these quiet moments these knowings bring no consolation the yearning only remains it is not insufferable but merely unpleasant a constriction that seeks not to rest i continue to walk in its fragility embracing the moments of joy that flutter through allowing her messages to just be perhaps at the very least my being will come to accept the longing that remains and chooses instead to build a relationship with it.. for now i grieve for all the little moments that still feel so left undone...